ER

My legs stuck to the seats. The building was frantic. Everything around me was going in slow motion. Everyone was a blur. I felt the steady thump of my heart pressing against my chest. I thought about where I was this morning.

I woke up the same way as I did every morning. I ate the same breakfast. I took the same bus. I went to work the same way. I sat at the same desk. Everything was same. But at the same time, nothing was the same. The phone rang. The message was given. My life was altered forever.  My child had been in an accident. My hands trembled as the phone dropped to the floor. Useless stands, my legs collapsed beneath the weight of my body. I lay there for an instant. In a moment of panic, action was so hard to come by. Finally, I forced myself up. In minutes, I raced to the hospital: my imagination the director of my thoughts.

I reached the hospital. Doctors tried to comfort me. It was too early to tell. I could not see her yet.  Something about procedure. But I was comforted. My heart started to beat to a slower drum. She was such a playful spirit, always on her own schedule. My worries started to dissipated into generous waves of optimism. Everything would be ok, a tiny hiccup in her life. I imagined the shopping adventure that I would take her on to make her feel better once I could. I would make sure to buy her ice cream. She would like that. The blond doctor entered the room. She said I could come in now.

There she was, smiling. I leaned in and hugged her. “Is she ok?” Jhene smiled. “She is ok” as she pointed to the ultrasound. I smiled. My dear Cali was ok. Five months into her young journey, and she was already proving to be a fighter. A bow. I would get her a pretty pink bow. Something to put a smile on her beautiful newborn face once she was mine to hold. I hugged Jhene and went to grab a coffee.